My Life Is Not My Own

linda boat (2)

Spirit lead me to where my trust is without boarders. Let me walk upon the waters, wherever you may call me.”  Oceans by Hillsong United

This last month has been a whirlwind.  It’s been stressful, overwhelming, amazing and incredible all at the same time.  I have been happy and sad, excited and scared, overwhelmed and at peace.   What has caused this crazy variety of emotions? I have recently changed jobs.  Changing jobs can be a difficult, awkward, disorienting, uncomfortable  transition.  But it’s definitely worth it!

Many people are wondering…Why did I leave my permanent job at The Salvation Army as Community and Family Services Coordinator for a one-year maternity leave in an Office Manager position at Connexus Community Church?  Let me try to explain.

Simply put, God called and I obeyed.


Life Change

Six years ago, I first set foot in the Galaxy movie theatre to attend Connexus.  I had no faith and I really didn’t know what to expect. I would never have imagined that God would have moved me so much that over the last six years; I have accepted Christ, survived debilitating depression, been through two major surgeries, worked for an incredible social services Christian organization and now actually working for Connexus!!   Never in a million years would I have planned this life for myself.  Yet, all things are possible with God.

Decision Making

The decision making process was quite involved.  I prayed (a lot!). I had many conversations with my husband. I sought wise council.  I weighed the pros and cons. This was not a decision that my husband and I took lightly.  We finally realized that if I didn’t obey God’s calling, I would be miserable.  And that would eventually led me to not being of benefit to anyone.

Something Stirred

Even though I loved my job at the Salvation Army and am passionate about helping the less fortunate in our community, something changed.  About six months ago, God placed on my heart that it would be time to leave soon. I tried to ignore it.  I tried to pretend it wasn’t there.  I got mad at God and tried not to listen.  Yet, I knew that something was stirring.  I had no idea what, just something.  At the time, I didn’t know that the stirring would lead to Connexus.

God Knew

Something did happen when I was in Guatemala.  I had completely forgotten all about it until after I accepted the position and my friend reminded me. We attended an evening church service together, and at the end of the service I turned to her and said “I just have to say…one day I am going to work at Connexus.  That is all.”  I think she was as shocked about the statement as I was!! I followed up with “I have no idea when or how, just that it will happen.”  I don’t remember what the message was that day at church, but obviously it moved me.   A few months later that statement became true.

The Risk 

There is a huge risk in taking this position.  Being a contract position, I may be unemployed in a year.  Yet, I may not.  It is a risk that my husband and I are willing to take.  When an opportunity arises to develop, learn and grow, we need to take it.

Transforming Impact on Others

Leaving the Salvation Army was difficult.  A lot of tears were shed over the two weeks after I submitted my resignation.  I felt truly humbled and overwhelmed by the love and support from the volunteers and staff.  I had no idea the transforming impact that I had, had on so many people.  I was amazed and I still am.   I will be forever grateful for this chapter in my story.  The SA will always be in my heart.

Moving Forward

Now, I’m moving forward, starting the next chapter in my life story.  I’m  honoured to work with such an incredible, committed, driven team and I’m excited to allow God to use me in whatever capacity he chooses.  I love my home church, Connexus.  It is my passion. I have been serving as a volunteer for five years in many different leadership roles.  I am energized by helping people develop or grow in their relationship with Jesus.  I respect the leadership and truly believe in the mission and vision.  My heart is for the unchurched.

Having Faith

So, yes, I’m stepping out in faith.  Jesus asked me to step out of the boat, and I’m going for it.  Where will I be in a year? Only God knows.  Did I expect to be where I am now, six years ago, when I first set foot in Connexus?  No way!  I could never have imagined. Ever! But God has plans for me and I choose to trust Him.

People have asked me;  How are you able to trust at this level?  I just do.  God has transformed my life, totally and completely.  I have chosen to put my faith and trust in Him.  My life is not my own.  It is His.

My question to you is: Do you trust God with your life?

Psalm 139:16
All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. 

Note: As always, the above thoughts, opinions and experiences are my own and do not reflect The Salvation Army or Connexus Community Church.

10 Replies to “My Life Is Not My Own”

  1. As usual another excellent story …you are definitely talented special and blessed and called …like the good pastors are … You are an inspiration and inspirational😇😇😇😇. Keep going you are on a special chosen track … See you all soon the water is getting warmer God speed 😘😘😘😘

    ..Enjoy your day…. Stuart F.


  2. Linda, it is not the same at all with you gone. You were an inspiration and full of life, love and beautiful smiles. I know you had to do Gods calling as I had to when I went to the SA. He knows what He’s doing and I am sure there are better things in the future for you. YOU GO GIRL….


    1. Awe, I miss you and all the amazing volunteers, too! But someone great will be in the position soon.
      You are a gift to many at SA. Your selflessness and giving heart is so appreciated. You go girl!!

  3. Dear, dear Linda, Thank you so much for sharing your blog with me. Reading it has helped to set my mind and heart at rest. It reminded me of a book by John Ortberg (formerly of Willow Creek )that I read some years ago. I think the title was: “If you want to walk on water you have to get out of the boat.” Be assured of my continuing love and prayers as you continue to work through these days of transition. Gwen

    1. It is a deep question, isn’t it? And it’s one that we will have to ask ourselves over and over throughout our lives. Thankfully, we have a God full of patience and grace. 🙂

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